I’ve written these questions in response to observing my own way of grieving. I hope they help you to connect to your personal experience of grief and know that you are not alone in your feelings.
How deep is your grief?
Does life feel surreal?
Can you not quite believe they’ve gone?
Do you feel like you’ve lost a part of yourself?
Are you feeling heartbroken?
Are you feeling lost without them?
Have you reached new depths of despair?
Do you miss them so much that it’s agony?
Do you think this feeling will never end?
Are you able to step back and observe yourself during your grief?
Do you feel wobbly or numb?
Is the lump still lodged in your throat?
How does your gut feel?
When you’re on the brink, how often do you actually give yourself over to crying?
How often do you catch yourself crying a little more than you need to?
Do your tear ducts burn when the tears rise?
How heavy does your heart feel?
Are you pining for them, yearning to have them back in your life?
Is your waking thought about them?
Do you panic when you’re amongst other people and imagine yourself fleeing, arms in the air – wailing?
How hard is it to get motivated to do anything, like even watering your plants?
Do you wonder how you will ever adapt to life without them?
Do you take solace in seeing photos of them or do you avoid all reminders?
Do you replay traces of their voice?
Do you blame yourself for not doing enough?
Have you found someone else to blame or be angry at?
Have you found someone to talk to?
Have you found some relief?
Have you found a way to process your emotions – writing or drawing?
Do you find exercise helps shift your thinking?
Do you find by being surrounded by nature it helps you heal?
Do you take comfort in remembering all the love you shared?
Are you being gentle on yourself?
Are you taking good care of yourself?
Almond trees in blossom
These almond blossom watercolours have become popular to use as sympathy cards. If you’d like to have one of these gentle watercolours in your life, they are available as A5 size originals, as greeting cards and as an art class, where you can learn how to paint them for yourself.
I hope they help to bring you some peace.